I'm in love!
I don't understand why Dale got all shocked about it--it's not like I see her having much more than a once-every-four-years love life. Clearly, I just have high standards. And when I saw that gleaming white, impeccable and yet tousled, black-eyed, pink-tongued, Spitz today at the park, I knew I'd made the right choice all these years of feigning total sexual indifference to those Pugs and Yorkies and run-of-the-mill Lab mixes. I have standards, and I was saving my DNA for a canine Brad Pitt. And there he was. Everything got fuzzy, I lost all sense of time, suddenly there were no other dogs there except me and him, violins were playing, pheremones were flying...
And I got a little confused. It's been a while. I mounted him. Her. We were both female. And spayed.
I don't want to talk about it.